Dear Family and Friends,
We write to you today with some news that you may not be expecting . . . the news is that we will soon be a family of 5. "Daniel" is the name of our new son and he is 3 years old. The way that Daniel's life became woven with ours is a story, once again, of God's grace and leading. And it is not at all how we expected that this story would be written. We invite you to read about how God wrote this story in a way that only He can.
Receiving DanielIt was around three years ago when Dan and I sat on the steps outside of a Nicaraguan restaurant passionately discussing adoption. I was frustrated with him for not being open at that time to the idea of adopting a child. He was frustrated with me for suggesting such a significant life change at a time when our family was still spinning a bit from moving to a foreign country. It was around this same time that a friend and former NCA teacher, Kate Portenga, stopped me at church one Sunday morning and said that she had had a dream about our family. She said that in her dream, our family had adopted two children. But, that the weird part was that I was living in an apartment complex with the adopted kids and Dan was living in our home. I remember thinking about how her dream reflected where Dan and I were at in regard to the possibility of adoption at that time – we were in different places. And yet, I was encouraged by her dream and have always kept this in the back of my mind.
Then came God's call to home school our kids. This was a difficult and confusing call because our kids were thriving at NCA and we knew that they were getting a good education. I was often asked by students whether I was a teacher at NCA because I was on campus so often volunteering and serving alongside teachers, leading teacher Bible studies, speaking to students at chapel, and meeting with kids for devotions in their classrooms. I absolutely loved serving in all of these ways and enjoyed the friendships and community I experienced there. However, "the call" was one that was so clear that Dan and I knew we really had no other choice but to obey. Both kids were positive about homeschooling having had good memories of the time I homeschooled them individually during their first grade year in the U.S. which was confirming and made the transition easier.
In hindsight, we now recognize that it was home schooling that gave us the flexibility, the time, and the opportunity to spend our Friday afternoons at the Los Cedros orphanage organizing activities for the kids there and getting to know and love them. And then one day it happened . . . we fell in love with a two year old little girl. God used this little girl to open up the discussion about adoption between Dan and I once again. However, weeks later, this little girl was adopted by a family in Spain and I remember this being difficult for Rebekah and Will and I – needing to say good-bye to her. Soon after this happened, Michelle, who I have mentioned in previous updates, adopted her two little girls. We watched these sweet little girls blossom in her care and in the midst of a family. We also spent a lot of time with Michelle and her family while they were here for three months and learned more about the process of adoption as we prayed for them through the different stages in the process.
Sometime in the midst of our time with Michelle and her family, I received a call from Dan in the middle of the day. He said to me (in a very profound kind of way), "Lisa, when it comes to adoption, I am convinced . . . and then he paused and in my head I filled in the blank with "that we are not called to do this." But instead, what he said was, "that God is calling us to do this." It was the first time I had ever heard him say these words and I will never forget that moment. I even remember where I was standing when I talked with him on the phone! Dan explained more later about how God had been working in his heart over the course of the year to lead him to an openness to adoption. It was a journey that I was unaware of at the time, but so thankful for how God called and reassured Dan that this was of Him.
From there, we wondered who the child/children God was calling us to adopt was/were. There was a sibling group of three at the Center that we dearly loved and we had talked about whether God was calling us to adopt these children. However, we could never get to a place of peace about this. Months later, a family arrived in Nicaragua to enfold these three kids into their family. As we watched their family, we knew that these children were meant for them. It was another beautiful picture of God creating a family. And we could see that it was good.
Rebekah and Will and I continued to go the orphanage weekly, but over time something started happening in me that I knew was not healthy. I could not enjoy the kids anymore. I found myself so focused on whether this or that child was "the child"/"our child" that I could not engage with the kids as easily as I had before. I felt driven to analyze them in order to figure out if they would "fit" in our family. I knew I was being driven by my own "need to know" rather than following God and resting in knowing that He would reveal who the child was in His time. So around last October, I decided I needed to take a break from playing with the kids myself. We continued visiting the Center, but I began to bring some work to do in an office building while Rebekah and Will played with the children.
In November, Lianne, the director of the orphanage, was in our neighborhood to talk with our neighbors who had just adopted a little girl from the Los Cedros Center. As Lianne was driving out of the neighborhood, I stopped to talk with her. During the course of our conversation, Lianne (who knew that we were thinking about adoption) asked if our family would pray about adopting a little boy named "Daniel". Rebekah, Will, and I had known Daniel for two years, but we were thinking that the child we would adopt would be a girl. Daniel also had not been able to walk during the course of his two and a half years and was often crying. So, he was regularly in the care of the caregivers as the kids and I played with the children who were mobile. However, I told Lianne that we would pray about whether God was leading us to Daniel. Dan and I did pray about Daniel, and yet, there were other children that the kids and I had grown attached to because we had spent so much time with them and had been watching them grow and develop from week to week. It was all just so confusing.
One December night, I lay in bed talking with God and said, "God, will you just show us who this child is? Would you just make it so clear that we cannot miss it? I am so tired of trying to figure this out." December and January were probably the busiest months we have ever experienced here in Nicaragua. It started with a trip to Costa Rica; the day after we returned, my parents came for a two week visit; a few days later, Mark Forstrom who came to speak at the Love and Logic workshop, arrived and stayed with us for nine days; and I was busy with organizing the Workshop as well. The day after Mark left, I found out that my Dad had been hospitalized after having some small heart attacks which lead to surgery and four days in ICU after some complications. Rebekah, Will, and I had not visited the Los Cedros Center from the middle of December through the end of January due to the business of our schedule.
On January 31, I received a phone call from, Stuart, a friend of ours who is a talented photographer. It was a Friday and he asked if we were going to the orphanage that day because he was wondering if he could go with us to take pictures of the kids there. I had honestly been planning to skip our visit that day because Rebekah and Will and I were exhausted. However, Stuart's interest in going to the Center nudged us to begin our weekly visits once again after the long break. And so we went. The funny thing about that day is that it feels like a dream to me. We walked up to the building where the kids stay and one of the first kids out of the door was Daniel. He was walking! He looked at me and ran over to me with his arms open wide requesting that I pick him up. I remember feeling shocked that I had just seen Daniel walk and then run! I was also very surprised that he even wanted to come to me when I had never really spent much time with him and had not even seen him for months! For the rest of that afternoon, Daniel stuck close to me and Stuart snapped picture after picture of me and Daniel as I fell in love with him. Dan visited him the following week and Daniel walked right up to him requesting that Dan hold him. Dan too felt a connection with Daniel. Both Rebekah and Will have been excited about inviting Daniel to be a part of our family. In fact, Will said, "We have lost so many kids already to others who have adopted them. I hope that we get to have Daniel!" And Rebekah regularly asks about when Daniel can come home.
One of the most beautiful parts of Daniel's story is that Stuart had no idea that we had even been considering adoption. He did not know that we were praying specifically about whether God would have us adopt Daniel. He was unaware that weeks prior to the day he was taking these pictures I had prayed for God to show us the child He desired to be a part of our family. And so as Stuart was looking for good shots and angles, what he was really capturing through his lens was a love story that was just beginning. It is the kind of love story that takes a person by surprise . . . a love that has been so clearly inspired by God . . . a love for a child who we had known for two years, yet did not recognize as
the gift that he is until God opened our eyes to see it.
He prepared each member of our family at different times and in different ways
to receive this gift. It has also been
a gift for Rebekah and Will to be able to go to the adoption appointments with us and to live this process fully with us during the time that they are home for school
. These are among the many unexpected gifts from our thoughtful and loving adoptive Father. Daniel was born three years ago, having just celebrated his third birthday this past January. As I write this story, I reflect back on how the conversation Dan and I had about adoption while sitting on the restaurant steps happened sometime between three and four years ago. I have been wondering about how close to Daniel's conception or birth this conversation happened. This seems significant to me as God was already preparing a family for Daniel prior to or close to his birth
. And this little baby boy was given the name "Daniel" – the very name of the man who would one day be his earthly father. As I think about these things, I am reminded of the words of Psalm 68:6 from the Message . . .
Father of orphans, champion of widows, is God in his holy house. God makes homes for the homeless, leads prisoners to freedom . . . God has made a home for Daniel – a
home in each one of our hearts and in our family. And God has led Daniel's new Ma Ma to a new place of
freedom as she remembers how God's plan is always above and beyond what she can imagine. And that she can live life resting in the truth that His plan
will come to pass at just the right time and in just the right way.
Your prayers for our family and this transition are very much appreciated. We are so thankful that Daniel gets to be a part of a much larger family than our own with many people who will love him and pray for him and pour into his life.
Thanks too for reading his story. I know you committed time to do so. We are thankful for your interest in the details of how God has been at work in our family through the life of a little boy named Daniel. We will have more to share soon as our paperwork is almost complete to begin the fostering process. Thank you once again for your prayers.
Peace to you,
Lisa (Dan, Rebekah, and Will) Van Zoest
